Sunday, July 20, 2014

My current desktop photo is Queen Anne’s lace with the Lake in the background. It looks cool on my desktop, although I realize this picture may not impress you much.

I went a long ways in cleaning up my notes the last time I wrote, but there are still things from our Pennsylvania trip I want to tell you about.

BUT...

They will have to wait. So forgive me if I jump back and forth in time and I promise that I will not make this letter too long. Okay?

I have some sad news.

Michael’s daughter, Tami died early this morning. She had just turned 45 on the 11^th of July and had lung cancer that metastasized to the brain and adrenal glands. At least that’s how far it had spread when she refused any more treatments. For the last couple of months they were just keeping her comfortable.

In my photo, Mike is standing beside his brother’s sister Toni. (A family joke. “She’s not my sister, she’s my brother’s sister!” Mike has said many times.) Tami is seated with her adopted sons on either side of her. I took the photo December, 13, 2011. Tami wanted to reconcile with her father after a very long estrangement-20 some years! And that was the reason for the visit. Mike and Tami talked on the phone several times since then and we saw her and the boys again the next year at our huge Magic Dragon Car Show. They were going to come for the car show again in 2013 but that was when the cancer was discovered.

This past week we got word that Tami was not doing well, so Mike and I decided to go see her. Friday morning we took off and drove to Rockford, Illinois.

I can’t tell you what a shock it was to see Tami in the condition she was in. Cancer had transformed this once vibrant, beautiful gal into little more than a shell. When we got there Friday afternoon, Tami was sleeping and we didn’t think we should wake her, so we left to find a motel room for the night.

At this point I need to tell you the names and relationships of the people in my story, so you can understand who’s who, so please bare with me for a moment.

A few years after Mike and Tami’s mom Mary, divorced, she married a man by the name of Mel. Then Mary died of cancer about 17-18 years ago. Mel has since remarried and his current wife is Gail. And let me tell you! She seems like she is an awesome lady. Gail has been taking care of everything from what I can see.

Mike let Gail know we were there and even though we saw Tami, we hadn’t talked to her because we didn’t want to wake her.

“Wake her,” Gail said. “I know she’ll be glad you did.”

So we settled into a motel room, unpacked and decompressed for an hour or so, then cleaned up and went back. Tami was still sleeping, but we woke her.

It was hard.

We tried to talk with her, but between the coughing and her voice being so weak, we couldn’t understand what she was saying most of the time. Then she wanted to sit up, but didn’t want any help in doing so. It was slow going as she had to stop several times every minute to cough. Once she was up I could see she had stuff in her mouth and needed some help, so I went off to the nurses station. The nurse or aide or whatever she was, came in and turned on a suction machine and gave Tami the straw. That was tremendously helpful rather than trying to spit into a tissue or basin and much more effective. Mike couldn’t bare it all and had to leave the room. It was an agonizing 40 minutes until she had enough junk out of her lungs that she could speak more than a single syllable at time. At one point I patted the top of her foot.

“That hurt my foot,” she said. I was mortified and apologized profusely. But I could understand her without asking her to repeat herself. So I called Mike to come back in the room.

“Gail will be here in a little while with the boys,” Mike told us, referring to Dillon and Devon, the adopted sons.

Shortly after Gail arrived another man showed up and they asked us to leave the room so they could take care of some business. Mike and I took the boys out to the waiting area and visited with them for a while.

After all the paperwork was taken care of, we sat with Tami, Gail, and the boys for a little longer, then said our goodbyes, telling Tami we would see her in the morning before we headed for home.

In the parking lot, Gail told us the arrangements for the care of the boys was now finalized and it seemed to take a load off Tami.

Mike and I saw Tami for a few minutes the next morning. She must have been awake for a while because she sounded stronger.

“I’m glad you came,” she told her dad.

“I am too,” Mike responded, hugging, kissing and exchanging I love yous.

Then we left, only to get the phone call this morning.

Isn’t this a funny looking caterpillar? It looks like he has great big eyes, but they aren’t eyes! They are spots to fool predators.

“What kind of butterfly will he be?” I hear you ask.

He will be a swallowtail. More specifically, he will be a Spicebush (or Spicebrush) Swallowtail. They are the ones that were on the butterfly weed in my desktop photo last week.

I found him in the parking lot, a long way from anything green. I picked him up and brought him upstairs with me with the intention of releasing him someplace a little more woodsy when I took the girls out for their evening walk.

I’ve learned a lot about these caterpillars since I found this one. For instance, this little guy is in his fifth instar.

“What the heck is that?” you wonder.

I know, right! That’s what I wondered too! Instars are the period between molts. So these little guys molt five times before they pupate, then they become adult, starting a new life as a butterfly.

I had to really really look hard to find a reference to emitting an odor. I thought I would find it on the websites that talk about the lifecycle of the butterfly, but there wasn’t a single mention of it on the first three websites I checked. So what did I do? I Googled ‘spicebush emit odor’ and that’s were I found out that they do. But I had already guessed that they did. When I picked this one up, I smelled a faint, vaguely lemony, skunkish odor and thought it might be from the caterpillar.

Once in the apartment I left him mostly alone, until I was ready to take him out and release him. Then I thought I would try to get a better photo of him. I teased him until he stood up, then I noticed he stuck his tongue out at me! He must have been really mad.

Cool! I think and I was going to try to get a picture of it for you, but it wasn’t long at all until I noticed that same skunky smell as before and the more I teased him, the stronger it got!

Uh-oh. I’m making the whole place stink! I better get him out of here before Mike notices. So quick as I could, I harnessed up Itsy and Ginger, grabbed my walking gear and Mr. Spicebush and out we went!
In my online investigation I learned about the defense mechanisms of this cute little guy. What I thought was a tongue was really the osmeterium of the caterpillar. When attacked, the larvae will stand up, creating the illusion of a snake and expose this y-shaped organ typically folded up within the caterpillar. For many Spicebush Swallowtails, the osmeterium is red in color, thus resembling a snake tongue, even further enhancing the disguise. It is this organ that emits the odor.


Now, before anyone gets any thoughts about me teasing him, all I did was touch him with a paper towel. He didn’t like that at all!

There is death, and there is life. I think it is all in God’s plan.

Lots and lots of love,

Peg and Mike